YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN - ACCEPT IT!
What a God-given gift...that at the end of your career...to be given the opportunity to kill an active shooter during his act. The mere thought makes the blood race and the heart sing.
And to be such a craven coward as to turn your back not only on children being killed, but on your sacred duty, and on a gift from God, an opportunity such as this...why it is unthinkable for any man. Words do not come close to describe it. Beyond disgusting. The samurai had a way of making up for such a self-dishonor.
You are on your own. Nobody is coming to help you.